tragic cold-hearted unicorn
enkannerligen is that you
one more step towards a license and a car ~___~ i had to send a fax and fight awful customer service to pass this goddamn taste wowwww
ESTP: super attractive physically but it’s all downhill from there. never quite know what they’re going to do next but you can probably bet it will be irresponsible. somehow still lovable.
ESTJ: loud, logical, and get shit done — they are the warrior class of the life rpg. power stats make them unbeatable and if you encounter one, maybe just curl up and forfeit, to save time.
ESFP: giggly little shits. fun fun fun till her daddy takes the t-bird away. great for lifting your mood, not that great at lifting your credit score.
ESFJ: too appropriate, totally lacking in awkwardness. they’ll never forget your birthday, which will make you feel like shit when you constantly forget theirs.
ENTP: excellent companions if you enjoy people who instantly see through all your shit. very clever and very intuitive, you can’t fool them. i suggest you invest in other friends — ones you *can* fool.
ENTJ: impatient with people who make mistakes, namely, everyone. they’ll respect you if you stand up to them but why do that when you can run away instead. cuddle them and see what happens. i’m curious.
ENFP: too puppy to live. best suited for the profession of musical nanny. not advised for use around an open flame.
ENFJ: way too charming and capable, maybe they should stop making everyone else look bad. prone to making other people care about stuff they didn’t want to care about. so annoying.
ISTP: such butts. best suited for an apocalypse scenario, if no such scenario exists, they will create danger because they get bored. don’t encourage them, but don’t discourage them, as reverse psychology works too well.
ISTJ: low drama and low maintenance, best value at this price tier. best suited to actual human existence. least weird, which makes them kinda weird.
ISFP: squishy little darlings you might want to keep in your pocket, but please don’t or they will become forlorn. they notice everything, and it’s unnerving.
ISFJ: quietly and proudly do things for others. if you have a ring you need to deliver to mordor, take an ISFJ along with you for best results.
INTP: cute intergalactic spiders you want to hug and mistrust. prone to making you laugh but then days later you will wonder whether you were the butt of the joke.
INTJ: major dicks and kinda proud of it. prone to being right. prone to liking trance music way too much. all the ones i’ve ever met have been unexpectedly kinky. so i guess, expectedly.
INFP: they fall out of the sky and are raised by unicorns. if you feed one it will follow you home. they dissipate in water.
INFJ: chameleons appropriating your emotions and going quietly mad. prone to meltdowns and needing lots of naps.
NIALL WOULD BE THE ONLY REASON ANYONE IN HIS CLASS PASSED HISTORY OF MAGIC BECAUSE HE HAS NO TROUBLE RETAINING THE DATES AND DETAILS OF EVERY GOBLIN BATTLE
NIALL WOULD ALMOST CRY WHEN HE REALIZED THAT ON A BROOMSTICK YOUR BAD KNEE DOESNT MATTER
NIALL WOULD BEFRIEND EVERY HOUSE ELF IN THE KITCHEN SO HE WOULD ALWAYS COME BACK TO HIS COMMON ROOM WITH POCKETS FULL OF EXTRA TREACLE TARTS THEY GAVE HIM
NIALL’S PARENTS ARE MUGGLES WHO DON’T QUITE UNDERSTAND THE TRANSFIGURATION PUNS HE MAKES BUT THEY CHEER LOUDER THAN ANYONE WHEN THEY WATCH HIS PRO QUIDDITCH GAMES
fucking!!! FUCKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BOBBY HORAN AT NIALL’S FIRST QUIDDITCH MATCH! NIALL ACCIDENTALLY CHARMING HIS HAIR TO BE LILAC FOR A WEEK AND THEN TRYING TO FIGURE OUT! HOW TO TURN IT BACK! HOUSE ELF FAVORITE!!!! HIS PATRONUS IS A RAM!!! FAVORITE CLASS IS ASTRONOMY!!!
when u accidentally click a link so u dont release the mouse and kind of slowly drag away from the link. threat avoided. citizens safe. for now.